Let me look again. Take the glasses off. No wait! He’s leaning back into your arms. Maybe one day you’ll get another chance. Another moment.
It all goes by, don’t you? The orbit can be so small next to the mountains. Day in, day in, another laugh, actually I wish and wait for the cry. It means it all matters so deeply.
He’s got that big smile you can’t deny. You know what I’m talking about, don’t you? He looks up from his hands, making busy, but there is that glance. He sees you see. Soren smile. There will be no crying, no fighting, only these things he carries in his eyes. Yes, they are blue. Always remind of endings and the new, because what else should a baby do?
The little hands bouncing around so free in the air.
The instant stop and wobble, the double take for the next turn around the corner.
It comes so easy to him, and appreciation of the speck or dot, or stick, or a hand holding back or patting forward.
Just tell me the secret to slowing down the time with you. Is it a sweet song? Is it shutting down the pixel-lit glow and holding your hand?
Is it watching 2200 Kelvin flying across the last breath of ray?
That won’t hurt. It wouldn’t hurt to watch more sunsets set to ballads with you.
Give me a million, and I won’t get bored with my head on your shoulder. Whisper, I love you, so simple, but I mean it so so bad. You know I do.
What else could give me more deep, more slow, more long, more farther, more, more, more? Let me think. No substance to fuel the fire, just the glorious human experience rich with knowing how good it can be, and a little bit of shame for how bad I can.
Back to more.
Trying hard with you, double black diamonds, starting the motor when it won’t. Crossing the border. You remember that time. Damn. Let’s do it again. Let’s pass on this to the kids, with the kids.
I can’t wait. It’s Sunday, January 21st, and I’ve known you for over a decade, and I love you. Like I always say, more than the day before, more than at any point I can remember. I miss you. I can’t wait to hear your voice. Give the Nino a kiss for me. Whisper to him, “I love you.” Make sure your eyes show his blues what you mean. He needs to always know. I do. Love you.
Benjamin
