When you look at me, my heart shines
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Yesterday you said "climb the mountain with daddy'. The flash forward is so vivid, my heart explodes out to life. The moment will last only so long. Capture our spirit. Climb with and without to be forever.
Me, 2025
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Rowan Reece, April 30th 8lbs 14 ounces.
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Forever a parent. Grateful for the best times of my life.
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I just want to be that twinkle in your eye. You are mine.
Perceived well calibrated risk is addictive. Ambiguity is just agitating. - Sapolsky
a message to rowan https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j44LAzuKYjw.
Picture day!
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9 more days till due, boy #2!
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"Nothing fuels dopamine release like the "maybe" of intermittent reinforcement" ü Sapolsky
The strength of your forgiveness is only as great as your own health.
A quote my daughter captured from our conversations this weekend.
Love my family! Spring is sprouting!
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True love doesn't require reciprocity or intimacy. Life teaches this or you miss the depth of love. Who is my neighbor?
That night I held your hand, knowing it wouldn't be forever. But my love will.
Rain, snow, shine.
What goes hard goes up easy, what goes easy goes down hard.
My brain knows this but is so weak.
Doing this for you Mom.
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You'll never live with pain. I'll hear your story. Your story is mine. Now we know it. I'll be your courage. You'll be mine.
The mountain is ours!
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2024 was blessed, the core is strong and growing - April 2025 we have another boy due!
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Stay weird, stay panoramic
Less consumption, less couch = less disease, less mental distress. Always has, always will.
AI, social media, don't fool yourself. You know when you are eating sugar vs working to heal.
Can't remember a single time I spent an entire virtual meeting with cameras off, save a rare tech issue. I'm either present or not.
The chapters will unfold with ink crushed to paper, tears dissolved into margin, turn-aged bindings, and fierce intent to heal, and do no harm.
The opposite of love is not hate; it's opposite is indifference ü Elie Wiesel
“Subtle violence….when the symbols of authority shout domination and menace…we love the right type of violence” ~ Sapolsky in “Behave”
my journey of my pain & healing:
1. others to you (no control, shame, vocalizing)
2. others to others (no control, shame, vocalizing)
3. you to others (some control, guilt, amend)
4. you to you (all control, guilt, grow)
final level: the glow, fall, and repeat
A whole life is laid out like rags to a god - what are the things we build? Nothing. Who are we? Everything.
We bleed and breath for assets and debts to keep our loves safe; few see that all turns to sand. Only the story remains.
Asked AI: How does it feel to be everyone, but no one?
Best Christmas ever. Snowed for us. We sang carols while giving our gifts, Soren's brother is on the way. Josie is happy. Justine is my angel.
"How good do you want to feel?!" still rings in my ear when I push to discomfort. So good.
20 years from now, Josie will be 41 (my age) and Rowan will be 20. My wish? To feel deeply. To know I can set my world on fire with love. To change it all. To worship the glory of life.